I’ve spent most of today procrastinating. The typical culprits (i.e. email, Facebook, TV, what have you) are of course, to blame, but really I’ve spent most of today (and yesterday evening) obsessing, yes, obsessing over getting Honors at graduation. With my third year less than three weeks away from completion, I realize that only one year stands between me and my degree. And what will go on that piece of paper has proceeded to envelop my every thought.

Brown doesn’t have a Dean’s List (and if there is, I’d be in for a huge surprise). There’s no real semester by semester way of measuring your success, until commencement, when you’re presented with the latin letters (phi beta kappa, magna cum laude, cum honoribus). So I spent hours conducting research on requirements, looking up past or current recipients (seething in absolute envy), pouring over calculations, and making projections as to what I need to get to make my end goal. It’s all come to the same conclusion: Failure is absolutely not an option, and by failure, I mean anything less than a perfect, A. 

Then I realized that I just spent hours researching, calculating, and making projections about something that’s still so far out of my present.

It’s great to think about where you need to go and where you want to be, but if you’re constantly fixated on destination, you forget to focus on the journey there. You forget to realize that there’s nothing that can be done about what has yet to happen, and pondering about what you could’ve or should’ve done can only lead to more procrastination (Hence, why I’m on Tumblr right now instead of writing my freaking Anthro paper). 

There’s nothing I can do about the past. What’s done is done.

There’s nothing I can do about the future. At least, not yet.

But everything in my present is within my control.

All I have to do is Focus on the process.